Sara's Awards AboutNothing!
by Scary Italian Hippos
Summary: Well, you see, I'm bored one day, nothing to do, why not write a story! Just read dammit!
1. Funnest Person in the Worldeded Award

Hello, all. How are you? Well, this is my 2nd, COUNT IT, 2nd story I've posted on FF.net. Oddly enough, it is the first story I wrote. Let me announce, first and foremost, I didn't come up with Harry Potter and LotRs, J.K. Rowling and J.R.R. Tolkein did. And I blatantly ripped off some bits from Proffessor Charlotte Snapes story, "Charlotte and Severus's Random Anything Awards" I beg Ms. Snape to forgive me and recommend reading her story, as it is probably much better than mine. Well, now that that is out of the way, on with the show!  
SARAS' AWARDS ABOUT. NOTHING!  
  
Written by Sara  
  
Characters: Sara(host), Leah(co-host), cast of LotR, cast of HP, a bunch of other stoopy poopy people  
  
Setting: Large Stadium with millions, yes, MILLIONS of stars gathered to enjoy the. AWARDS ABOUT NOTHING!! WEE fun fun!  
  
::Sara and Leah walk onto stage::  
  
Sara: well HELLO EVERYONE!  
  
::cricket chirp::  
  
Sara: ::cough:: ahem, well, welcome to the. SARA AWARDS ABOUT.NOTHING! ::runs around in circles:: I've had 1 too many yoo-hoos  
  
Leah: this is going to be a loooong night ::pulls up comfy chair::  
  
Sara: Well on to the first award! AND THE FIRST AWARD IS.  
  
Leah: Let me guess.  
  
Sara: THE MOST FUNNEST PERSON IN THE WORLDEDED AWARD  
  
::cricket chirp::  
  
Sara: OY SHUT UP!! Ok any ways the nominees are  
  
::drum role::  
  
Sara: FRODO!  
  
::Frodo and Samwise run onto stage::  
  
Frodo: Samwise, why are you here too?  
  
Samwise: Mr. Frodo, you do not go anywhere without me, for I am you trusty sidekick ::wink wink::  
  
Sara: Anyways, Draco Malfoy!  
  
Malfoy: Thank you, thank you. I'd like to thank my fans, my girlfriend Maddi ::looks around, as though a bit scared::, my dad who probably fixed this so I'd win,.  
  
Sara: ::nudges Draco:: hey, you didn't win yet  
  
Draco:.Oh. Heh, heh, ::walks and stands behind Frodo, completely embarrassed by his stoopy poopy mistake.::  
  
Sara: and..Tommy Pickles!  
  
Tommy: ::magically turns into a 13 year old, and is acting extremely ghetto:: Hey yo, chuck, I'm up fer a SAAN! WHOO JA RULE FO LIFE DAWG  
  
Sara: Hmm. And the winner is.  
  
::drum role::  
  
Sara: ME! ::grabs award shaped like a potato::  
  
Leah: Hey you can't do that! It's against the rules!  
  
Sara: Its my award show! I can do whatever I want!  
  
Leah: Sara, just give someone else the award ::looks at Sara like she is an idiot:: ::which she is::  
  
Sara: Fine. LETS ASK THE AUDIENCE! ::points at audience:: Who do YOU want to win?? Who wants Tommy to win?  
  
Audience: ::2 people:: WHOO GO TOMMY he rules in da ghetto world forreal dawg  
  
Sara: o_O okee. who wants Draco to win?  
  
::cricket chirp::  
  
Maddi: WAIT! I WANT MY DRACO TO WIN! ::googley eyes:: I lubbers him! ::huggles him to death::  
  
Sara:. Well, since Tommy's just been shot by the 2 people that voted for him, and Draco's been killed by his girlfriend, Frodo wins by default!  
  
Leah: ::looks at Sara oddly::: Tommy's right there! What are you tal-  
  
Sara: ::covers Leahs mouth:: they don't know that ::points at audience::  
  
Leah: Yes they do! They are looking at him! See!  
  
Audience: :: applauding because they have no idea what's going on::  
  
Sara: see! I told you! FRODO WINS!  
  
Frodo: YAY! I win I win! ::flops into glass of water, those silly hobbits::  
  
Samwise: NO MR FRODO ::dives in after Frodo::  
  
Sara: Man am I thirsty! ::obliviously takes drink of water that has Frodo and Samwise in it and swallows them::  
  
Leah: SARA! YOU JUST SWALLOWED FRODO AND SAM!  
  
Sara: ::burp:: oops ter hehe ::smiles:: anyways  
  
Leah: ::sigh::  
Well, that's the first chapter. Up next. "THE CUTEST GUY IN THE UNIVERSITY OF UNIVERSES" award.  
  
OH YEAH! You know how some authors give you cookies if you review? Well guess what I got? LASAGNA!  
  
Come on! You know you want some! 


	2. Cutest Guy in the University of Universe...

Hello! Ready for the 2nd installment? Well, I must say THANK YOU to my 2 COUNT EM 2 reviewers! (I'm going to try and see if doing this makes bold, so don't mind if it doesn't work) bPoeticlilshygurl/b  
  
bStarre/b- well, I don't remember if Draco wins or not, because I wrote this a while ago, and I don't feel like altering it. I think I was going through an 'I hate Draco, he should die' stage, so forgive me.  
  
Also, Leah and Maddi are my friends, and I am Sara *hangs head in shame* yes I know, but get over it.  
  
ON WITH THE SHOWW!!!  
Sara: our next award is.CUTEST GUY IN THE UNIVERSITIE OF UNIVERSES  
  
Leah: I'm getting scared.  
  
Sara: And the nominees are.  
  
::Drumrole::  
  
Sara: LEGOLAS!  
  
Leah: YAY! Go my eggo!  
  
Legolas: Stop calling me that, Leah  
  
Leah: ok eggo ::runs around waving elfy wedding ring:: LOOK IM A ELF ::points at one pointy ear::  
  
Sara: RON WEASLEY  
  
Ron: Whazza. huh?  
  
Sara: Go back to sleep, my ickle ronnikines.  
  
Ron: hmm ok ::sleeps::  
  
Sara: AND.. DRACO MALFOY  
  
Malfoy: What? No I'm not! I'm not even remotely cute! (A/N- When I wrote this, I don't think I liked him, but now that I think about it, he is pretty easy on the eyes, isn't he?)  
  
Maddi: I THINK YOU ARE ::huggles Draco to death once more, for he seems immortal. Almost::  
  
Sara: ::whispers:: we ran out of cute guys, so we had to bring you in it  
  
Malfoy: help.. Me..:: is being squeezed to death by Maddi::  
  
Leah: ::playing piggyback with Legolas:: WEE  
  
Legolas:: get off me Leah  
  
Leah: I REFUSE TO DO SUCH A THING  
  
Sara: ::cough:: hmm ok and last but not least, dollar and sign!  
  
::dollar and sign walk in with masks on, as to not reveal their true identity::  
  
Sara: o_O otay and the winner is  
  
::drum role::  
  
Sara: DOLLAR AND SIGN! WEE  
  
Leah: you didn't even ask the audience!  
  
Sara: I didn't need to, they won!  
  
Leah: Sara.  
  
Sara: Leah.  
  
. . .  
  
Sara: OK I HAVE AN IDEA  
  
Leah: uh oh  
  
Sara: NO ITS GOOD! I think that we smash the award ::holds statue shaped like a squash:: and give little pieces to everyone! CUZ THEIR ALL CUTE! Except Draco  
  
Draco: help.me.please.::Maddi still holding strong::  
  
Leah:. OKAY!  
  
Sara: ::takes sledgehammer and shmooshes squash:: here you go everyone!  
  
Legolas: fun fun  
  
Ron: ::sleepily:: I won? Huh? What?  
  
Sara: go back to sleep Ronnie.  
  
Ron: okayyy ::Dreams::  
  
Dollar and sign: ::voice changed with those thingys that change voices.ya:: we would like to thank the academy. that's all  
  
Sara: otay.. On to the next award, THE BIGGEST NUTCASE AWARD!  
  
Leah: ::passes award to Sara:: congratulations, you win  
  
Sara: win what?  
  
Leah: the award  
  
Sara: really? Which award?  
  
Leah: the award you were about to present  
  
Sara: ::thinks a minute, unable to remember what the award was::  
  
Leah: the biggest nutcase award.  
  
Sara: ::thinks some more:: is that supposed to be insulting?  
  
Leah: yes.  
  
Sara: . o. ok! ::dances with Frodo::  
  
Leah: How can you be dancing with Frodo? You swallowed him!  
  
Sara:. I went potty.  
  
Leah: ::walks away, dismissing the thought::  
  
Samwise: Mr. Frodo, can I lick your feet?  
  
Frodo: o.O Errrrr..no?  
  
Samwise: ::heartbroken::  
  
Sara: ::teaches Frodo the newest polka steps::  
  
Leah: shouldn't you be dancing with Ron, anyway?  
  
Sara: He's sleeping! ::points at Ron, whose laying on the stage, dead asleep::  
  
Leah: oh.  
Hello! Err..at the time, as well, I was going out with Ron (in RP world, mind you) but he dumped me for Hermione u_U Oh well, I'll just go out with Fred! BWAHA! Oo anywhoo, I stole more from Prof. Charlotte Snape, I'M SORRY! And I think I smooshed 2 awards together, my bad. And I made Maddi sound kind of.er.murderous? I don't know, but she is a good friend even though she lives in Jersey and I live in PA. And, I made Leah sound intelligent and Me sound stupid, when it is usually the other way around. Alright, I'm done. Chow! Remember, review equals lasagna!  
  
NEXT! THE EVIL AWARD! 


	3. The Evil Award and INTERMISSION dun dun ...

Sara: and now for the next award! The EVIL award  
  
Leah: the EVIL award?  
  
Sara: yes Leah, the EVIL award.  
  
Leah: ::sarcastically:: who oh who could the nominees be  
  
Sara: ::overdoing it:: I am so glad you asked me that, Leah! The nominees are. VOLDEMORT  
  
Audience in unison: ::cringe:: SHH please say, he-who-must-not-be-named, or you-know-who, but not Voldem-::choke on their words::  
  
Vold-erm, you-know-who: WEE HEE I WON  
  
Sara: no you didn't  
  
You-know-who: yes I did  
  
Sara: no you didn't  
  
You-know-who: yes I did! ::cries like a baby::  
  
Sara:.. Something or other the WHITE (a.k.a the evil guy in LotR)  
  
Evil guy: wee hee! ::prances in flowers::  
  
Sara:.o_O and... LEAH!  
  
Leah: ME?!?!?!  
  
Audience: HER?!?!?!  
  
Ron: Huh? Wha? Why am I sleeping on the floor?  
  
Sara: go to sleep Ronnie poo kins  
  
Ron: oo all rigghhhtt ::sleeps some more::  
  
Sara: my Ronnie poo sure is a deep sleeper.o___O  
  
Leah: why am I evil?  
  
Sara: because I said so ::crosses arms like she's the boss::  
  
Leah::..ok.  
  
Sara: and the winner is... LEAH!  
  
Leah: ME!?!?!?  
  
Audience: HER?!?!?!  
  
Ron: Oy shut up! I'm trying to sleep  
  
::earthquake of noise::  
  
Sara: Leah, come get your award!  
  
Leah: I hate you Sara  
  
Sara: I know ^.^  
  
::endless applause from the audience, for some reason they like Leah o_o::  
  
Sara: Hey Leah,  
  
Leah: what Sara  
  
Sara: Sara would like to have a brief intermission, for the audience ::points at audience:: seem to need to use the restroom  
  
Audience: ::squirming in seat from lack of intermission::  
  
Sara: See! Sara is a nice person and she wants to let the audience take a break  
  
Leah: Does Sara like talking about herself in the third person?  
  
Sara: Yes, yes she does.  
  
Leah:....... Alright then......  
  
Sara: So, everyone gets an intermission.. A TEN SECOND INTERMISSION! BWAHA you only have 10 seconds to have all of you go to the bathroom and back! ::sticks tongue out::  
  
Audience: ::fly from bathrooms and back in 4 seconds flat, they have 6 to converse with each other::  
  
Sara: ::counting on fingers:: Hey Leah? What number comes after 2?  
  
Leah: I don't know. I honestly don't know ::crosses fingers::  
  
Sara: hmm, seems we hit 10 a while ago.. alright! 


End file.
